10. The only way to get the freeloading relatives to leave was to blast the Santa Fe CD and lip-sync in Speedos.
9. The cat got so fat collar doesn’t fit, and neither does your shoes.
8. Numbers melted off your credit card.
7. You now have a six quart a day egg nog habit.
6. Bought a Trumpet, lips been fat and numb for a week and now you lisp.
5. The tune “Chestnuts roasting on an open fire”, brings back some painful and embarrassing ER memories.
4. Eating a presto fire log that looked like a West coast burrito is common place in the Midwest.
3. Didn’t see any Elves until you ate the brownies.
2. By making minimum payments on your credit cards, this Xmas will be paid off the year the Raider nation gets off probation.
1. Spent 16 Thousand dollars on the family and you got house shoes.