10. Cousins Girlfriend drank a gallon of Colt 45 before the 9AM NFL game started.
9. Mother in law spent most of dinner talking about her pit bulls gum disease.
8. Leftovers included broke country relatives whose feet smelled like movie popcorn.
7. Cousin tried to rob the 7-11 with new electric knife, but the cord was too short.
6. The Turkey had a tattoo that read, Property of Oakland Hells Angels.
5. Spent the day at Lake Merritt trying to kidnap a huge duck.
4. Woke up from a nap wearing a Mohawk made out of gravy, with gizzards sticking out of your ears and green beans out your nose.
3. When dinner came out of the kitchen, your Uncle Chooch came out of the closet.
2. Your whole freestyle rapping the grace thing, caused the Church Deacon to slap you.
1. Someone bought the Mushrooms in Berkeley by mistake.