10. Your brother looks exactly like all of the Oakland Raiders.
9. You buy him golf clubs, he pawns them to buy Screaming Eagle Carburetor for his Harley.
8. They stole his identity in the morning, that afternoon he had it back, along with a truckload of DVD players and flat screens.
7. He waxes his Escalade with your English teacher’s toupee; he snatched at parent’s night.
6. When you say Happy Father’s day he says that’s what you think dork.
5. He uses the Armani tie you gave him as a headband and drank the cologne.
4. He wore house shoes and a hairnet to your College Graduation.
3. You plan to take him fishing, he brings a Glock.
2. He uses the gay sweater you gave him to cover the windshield of his Electra Glide.
1. He asks, what’s your Mama’s name? Nerd face.